Freakshow
by Night of StarClan
Summary: It the greatest Sh*t of a FanFiction you will find anywhere. Believe me. Please Review if you read, but no flames. Half of the credit for this fic goes to my friend. Rated M for a reason.


**So, I was in the park with my friend a long while ago and we talked and somehow got to the topic house of night. We let our thoughts wander and this...shit?...came out. It's really strange and an absolutely useless thing of a FanFiction, but it was funny making it up.**

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**Rated M for a reason.**

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**House of Night doesn't belong to me.**

**R&R please, and no flames!**

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**Thanks to Jessi for being such a great friend.**

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**Zoey:**

I thought I was crazy. You see, I was in a room with Neferet, Anastasia, Lenobia and Aphrodite. Unfortunately our conversation took a strange turn.

"Wasn't that night two weeks ago great?", sighed Nefert grinning.

Lenobia looked at her. "What do you mean?"

"_Our_ night! You, me, Anastasia and uhh….Darius!"

Aphrodite next to me stared wide-eyed, then huffed: "WHAT?! You fucked Darius?!" Neferet grinned brightly. "I'm going to kill her", hissed Aphrodite into my ear.

I tried to calm her down quickly and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Leave it Aphrodite…"

"Oh yes. Zoey's grandmother was there too", added Neferet.

"My what?! I hope I've heard wrong!", cried I angrily. What the hell was that now? Neferet shook her head. "I'M GOING TO KILL HER!", I roared and wanted to jump at her. That was when the door opened. Stark came in. He looked at me and then to my teachers.

"What are you talking about?", asked he curiously.

"Oh, about the night two weeks ago", muttered Neferet.

"Oh, the one with you, Lenobia, Anastasia, Darius, me and uhh…Zoey's Grandma?", asked Stark.

I was so close to rip his dammed throat out when he said that. That couldn't be. My grandma, really?

Neferet nodded with a laugh, then the door opened once more and Damien came in.

"What's so funny Professor?", asked he.

"Oh we're just talking about that great night two weeks ago…", answered Lenobia.

Damian grinned. "The one with you, Neferet, Anastasia, Darius, Stark myself and…Zoey's Grandma?"

"WHAT? Have all of you gone crazy? My Grandma? You don't really think I…"

"Calm Zoeybird. I was there. With Neferet, Anastasia, Darius, Stark, Damien and Lenobia", sounded a familiar voice from the doorway. I looked there. It was really my Grandma. I thought I dreamed then. How could this come any worse? That was when Jack came into the room.

"Hey guys. What's wrong?", asked Jack when he saw my shocked and angry face.

"It's about that great night two weeks ago", answered Damien to him.

"OH! The night with you, Neferet, Lenobia, Anastasia, Darius, Stark, me and, yes, Zoey's Grandma! It wasn't a question, it was statement. I was about to blow up.

Then Stevie Rae and Rephaim joined us. I whispered to her what was happening.

She started to laugh like a maniac and cried: "Oh that night was GREAT! With Rephaim, Anastasia, Lenobia, Neferet, Damien, Stark, Darius, Jack, and your grandma, Zoey!"

"Oh you all have got to be kidding me!", I cried and looked at Aphrodite for her.

She suddenly started to laugh now too. "I was there too, or have you forgotten that guys?"

I was about to throw up.

Neferet thought shortly, then counted on her fingers. "Lenobia, myself, Anastasia, Damien, Jack, Strk, Darius, Rephaim, Stevie Ray, Aphrodite, Zoey's Grandma…I believe there were more", she mumbled giggling.

"So many people don't even fit into a bed", I cried.

"Who said we lay on the bed?", asked Neferet.

"Alright enough! I'll jump out of the window. To hell with you guys!", I hissed, then turned and did exactly that.

A second before I hit the ground, I was stopped. Nyx appeared above me. "Zoey…that won't pay off.

She brought me back up to the room. "But Nyx, they talk about some night…two weeks ago and…"

"Oh, the night with Neferet, Darius, Stark, Lenobia, Anastasia, Damien, Jack, Rephaim, Stevie Rae, Aphrodite and your Grandma?", asked Nyx.

"Not you too", I whimpred. Where the hell did I land here, a Freakshow?

The door opened once more and Erin and Shaunee came in.

"What's going on here?", asked Shaunee.

"Not the same as two weeks ago?", added Erin.

"You two too?", I asked.

"Hell yeah, with Stevie Rae, Damien, Jack, Aphrodite, Darius, Stark, Neferet, Lenobia, Anastasia, Nyx and your Grandma", answered the twins unison.

"I think I've gone crazy now. My Grandma? I mean really, are you nuts?", I cried. Once again I ran to the window, intending to jump. I was sure, this time Nyx wouldn't stop me. But again someone caught me. Okay, it wasn't Nyx, but still. I heard flapping wings and when I looked up, I saw Kalona.

"There's no reason to jump out of a window and commit suicide", he said.

"Of course", I snorted. "I landed in a Freakshow!"

"Why that?"

"They always talk about some night two weeks ago!"

"The one with Neferet, Anastasia, Lenobia, Darius, Aphrodite, Stark, Damien, Jack, Erin, Shaunee, Stevie Rae, Rephaim, Nyx, myself and your Grandma?", eh asked.

"Not you too", I sighed.

When he brought me back up, I saw Dragon. Obviously he just got to know everything too. And he looked like he saw a ghost. That was when Travis, Lenobia's cowboy, joined as well.

"What's up?"

"We talk about this night", answered Lenobia.

"The one with you, Neferet, Anastasia, Damien, Jack, Darius, Aphrodite, Stark, Erin, Shaunee, Nyx, Kalona, Stevie Rae, Rephaim and Zoey's grandma?", asked he.

"And you", added Lenobia with a nod.

I looked at all of them. "And why the hell wasn't I there?" Not that I really wanted to, but the question was out a matter of principle.

"Zoey, your Grandma was there, that would've been incest", argued Aphrodite.

"And what about Rephaim? I mean, Kalona _is_ his _dad_", I argued back.

"And? Look at him. He can't get more strange anyways", answered she.

I looked at all of them in hatred.

"Calm down Zoey. I wasn't there either", muttered Dragon. He sounded as pissed as I was.

I looked up at him and asked: "So, want to do it now?"

He nodded and we both left the room. In the door I turned around once more.

"Vengeance is black pudding*!", I hissed.

And our goddess of Vengeance, Neferet, stood in the middle of the room, crossed her arms and pouted like a little girl while muttering: "I hate black pudding!"

**The end…**

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_*the black pudding thing is funnier in German. We really have that saying, but black pudding means exactly blood-sausage._


End file.
